Dear Baby

Expectation vs. Reality: The Halloween Edition.

I know better, really. I’ll dream up some sort of scenario in my head about an event like this - Everly’s first real halloween- the kind that she is old enough to actually participate in. And in my head, we light our carved jack-o-lanterns, leave the grandparents with a big bowl of candy for the trick or treaters, and we take our adorabley costumed children through the neighborhood for some family fun.

It’s a nice thought, isn’t it?

But the scenes in my head often do not play out that way in real life. In real life, the grandparents and the jack-o-lanterns are ready to go, but the toddler - my precious, doe-eyed little dear - she is having a full blown meltdown in the middle of the living room. It’s her costume. The hippo ballerina is not going over well. We have the leggings on and the body - but the minute I tie the little hippo hat around her chin, she loses it.

NO! NO! NO! NO! She throws it to the floor.

How about your pretty red tutu, I plead with her. Look how fancy! (I attempt to play on her love for dress up)

NO TUTU! She cries back

If you wear your costume, you can get some M&M’s!  (I resort to bribery)

NO!

All of the other children will have their costumes on! (I resort to peer pressure.)

NO!

I suddenly feel like one of those mother’s on Toddler’s and Tiaras who forces her child into some uncomfortable costume for the sake of her own desires.

OK, Everly, I say a little defeated, You don’t have to wear it.

I pull out a pair of butterfly wings I bought last minute while buying halloween candy (also, last minute). I thought maybe I’d throw them on as we took Everly around the neighborhood but now I’m hoping they’ll be a last ditch effort at getting her to wear something.

Everly happily puts the wings on with the hippo ballerina leggings and the top she’s worn all day.  She flaps her arms. Mirror! She shouts and off she goes to marvel at the reflection of her newly created costume.

“Sorry babe ,but your costume choice wasn’t fashionable enough for Everly.  Hippos aren’t the most stylish of creatures” Brent jokes with me.

He’s right though. This girl of ours, with her insane love of pink cowboy boots and sparkly necklaces and hair bows - even at 22 months old she knows what she likes. There is no amount of ballerina accessories on the planet that was going to convince her to be a hippo for halloween.

Arlo, on the other hand, fits the role of adorable baby Mad Hatter to a tee:

At least someone in this family is willing to play along.

My mom always made my costumes when I was growing up. She wasn’t that good at sewing (and neither am I) but the woman would create a brilliant costume for me every year. I scored a baby tuxedo off ebay for cheap and with some fabric, felt, ribbon and my glue gun - came up with this snazzy little get up for Arlo. I even made the top hat from scratch (pats self on the back)

We kept joking that he looked more like a flamboyant magician that the Mad Hatter - but hey, he was cute and we all got a good giggle out of it - so I’m calling it a success.

Back to our halloween reality: It’s raining. hard. and it’s cold.

Not ideal trick or treating weather, that’s for sure.

We decide to just hit up the immediate neighbors. Trick ot treat!! we all shout. Everly loves this part and gleefully puts a fistful of candy in her bag. Brent opens a pack of M&M’s. She never gets candy so this is a real treat.

We head back home after being out for all of twenty minutes. The wings and the tiny baby tuxedo come off. Pajamas go on.. The grandparents and a few friends hang out in our living room while Everly works off her M&M buzz.

A few older trick or treaters brave enough to endure the nasty weather come to our door. KIDS! yells Everly. She is now searching for them through the glass door.

We put the children to bed and I tuck away their little costumes. My lesson: Next year, I think to myself, Everly gets to pick out what she wants to be. No more scary pageant mom moments while I try to convince her to wear what I want her to wear.

Our dove woke up this morning pointing towards the front door and saying Kids! Kids!. She also pointed to the candy bowl and said More pwease! In her eyes, halloween was a roaring success. It was a fun night to eat forbidden sweets and greet neighborhood children at her front door. And the truth is, it wasn’t what I had expected, but when viewed through the eyes of my little girl, the reality of our halloween turned out to be everything I wanted it to be.

M

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