Mylah & Everly’s Down on the Farm 2nd Birthday Party.
Two weeks ago, I sent my best friend an email asking if we could push the girl’s joint birthday party to January 15th. We’d originally planned it for the 8th (right in between both of their birthdays) but since I couldn’t get my act together, I’d done nothing to plan for it, including the basics, like, you know… inviting people.
“I have a barn shaped cat house (more on that later), some cow print balloons, and I know I want to do some kind of sheep craft with cotton balls.” And that was my plan. At least my part of it, anyway. Natasha, (the best cook I know, who feeds me all the time, and also throws amazing parties) had her menu set long ago so I knew I had to get my butt in gear if I was going to pull together some decorations.
“Let’s keep it simple and small,” she said and I whole heartedly agreed. We invited immediate family and a couple friends. Four days before the party, realizing I still hadn’t done much, I got on amazon and searched the words “Farm party” - I bought barn shaped goodie boxes, some farm themed foam stickers, and some bandanas. With that purchase, I felt like I was back in the game. The night before, I set to work with a couple spools of ribbon, my beloved stack of colored felt, my trusty glue gun and some scrap book paper to make some decorations to hang up.
The day of the party, Natasha showed up with her amazing array of food and suddenly our simple, small party didn’t looks so small or so simple. It actually looked massive (and that was compounded by a few last minute phone calls to friends to say, “Hey why don’t you stop on by”). We kept laughing and saying “What happened to small and simple?!?” We had just spent the last few days asking each other “Can I do something else? I feel like I haven’t done enough!” and putting it all together made us realize we’d done plenty. We’ve joked that all future birthday parties, whether they are joint or for our individual kids, are going to require tag teaming as this was about as stress-free as party planning gets!
Here are a few of my favorite photos:
For the wall behind the food table, I pulled inspiration from this ribbon garland photo & this accordian flower tutorial.
I love that the wall display had an Americana vibe, I’d love to use it again during July 4th. See that barn on the table-that’s my cardboard cat box barn. During a late night insomnia-induced internet session, I found it on Amazon and was super stoked. Its original purpose was for cats to curl up in and play but it was the perfect piece to pull the farm theme together on our table. I was hoping to save it, but the day after the party, Everly climbed inside of it (tiny girl!) and then burst out like Godzilla and it’s now in several different pieces. RIP cat box barn, you were awesome!
We wanted simple comfort foods and Natasha put together a menu that included corn dogs, tater tots, corn on the cob and homemade chili with lots of fixins and dipping sauces.
She also made this adorable “Veggie Patch” and fresh berries basket that look straight off the back of a farmer’s truck. I reall loved the way she displayed them (note: she used a clementine box for the veggies!) And a big THANK YOU to my mother in law who let me raid her linens for all of the table coverings!
I went the easy route on cupcakes - box mix, a little cream cheese frosting and a sprinkle of green “grass” sprinkles. We stuck a little plastic farm animal in each to tie in the theme. (little ones need to be supervised as the farm animals are mouth sized!)
My Dove in her cutie farm girl outfit! I found the vintage overalls on etsy and I have to rave for a minute on the chickie hair clip. It was made by One Little Monkey and the shop owner, Carey, went above and beyond to get it to me in time for the party. Bonus points -I plan to use it again at Easter!
Our new living room full of family and friends. It was so much fun to have them all over as this was the first time many of them had seen our house.
It was a little chilly that day, but it never fails that the guys like to congregate outside, so we borrowed an outdoor heater and some quilt covered hay bales to make it more party friendly.
A quick shot of Brent and I during the fun.
Natasha and Everly stealing a quick snuggle in the kitchen. It’s the most amazing thing to have friends who love my children and vice versa. It makes this whole parenting experience easier when you have wonderful friends to share it with.
A few other fun little things:
Goodie boxes
Our octagonal play yard we turned into a “pig pen” with a bunch of pig-faced, pink balloons. (An idea we saw on Pinterest!)
Farm themed crafts - In the playroom we had a table set up with lots of crayons, markers, googley eyes, foam stickers, and other supplies so that the kids could make something to take home. (Look how proud Mylah is of her picture above - so sweet!)
To finish the day: a birthday song, presents, and time spent celebrating these wonderful little girls. It was the sweetest day start to finish.
Love,
M
Baby Babble.
I’ve found it really challenging to juggle both Dear Baby and my blogging at Babble these past few months. I do the large bulk of my writing and photo editing in the late hours after my children have gone to bed and it’s become increasingly challenging to do write and edit for both. The thing I hate most about not being able to get it all done is that I WANT to, so badly. I love writing for Babble and feel so honored to have the opportunity. I’m bound and determined to find a way to make it work. I’ve still got a lot to share this month, but I wanted to invite you to stop on over and check out some of my recent posts on Arlo’s First Year. Here’s what I’ve been babbling about:
1. I’m going to write in depth about this hear on DB, but we got some pretty spectacular news at Arlo’s last opthamology appointment.
2. My 8 month old has never slept more than 4 hours at a time. Most nights, I’m up with him every few hours. Anyone else have a similar experience? The details on my sleep deprivation are here
3. Baby Led Weaning FAIL! Arlo hated it and it stressed Brent and I out. Sometimes you just have to accept that certain methods aren’t going to work for your family needs. The good news: we have found a happy medium at meal time for our guy.
4. I thought losing my hair post pregnancy was bad - but THIS is worse!
5. I shared my favorite dealing-with-a-sick-baby tip from one of my mama mentors, Quyen! Check it out.
Thanks for reading and supporting me in all of my online ventures. My dream is to be able to take on a more active role in the blogging and social media world without it creeping into my dedicated family and career time. Is it possible? Who knows! but I’m sure gonna give it a try
Love,
M
Toddler Tools: 3 Simple ways to turn No! into Yes!
I am always hungry for smart tips and advice from other moms on things that work to make their daily life run a little more smoothly. With that in mind, I wanted to share 3 inexpensive items that have been helping us avoid major battles at meals, bath time and bed time lately.
1.DINNER TIME: The funny face plate!
Remember those magnetic wooly face toys from our childhood? This plate is like that but with your child’s meals! I love using this plate to make Everly’s dinner look entertaining and appetizing. She has been much more willing to eat veggies or proteins that normally go untouched if I disguise them as a beard and fluffy eye brows on the funny face plate. I found this one on a discount website but a similar version is available here!
2. BATH TIME: Glo-sticks in the bathtub! I originally saw this idea on Pinterest and thought it was brilliant. I’ve found packs of glosticks at Target for $1, so we try to stock up! If Everly ever refuses to take a bath, we just flip off the lights, toss a few in, and she’ll beg us to get in. Works every time!
3. BED TIME The Star turtle! This little guy was a present from Santa and he has been an AWESOME addition to Everly’s bedtime routine. We recently transitioned her into her big girl bed and turning on the Star turtle at bedtime has made her excited to crawl beneath the covers each night. She also loves changing the star colors from green to purple to orange and I like that it has a timer that turns it off after she falls asleep. He provides a sense of comfort and entertainment once we leave the room. We’re really loving this little guy!
Do you have any tools that aid in your daily routine with your toddler? We’re learning that adding a silly song or dance to almost anything we do makes Everly a more willing participant. It’s all about keeping them engaged and curious! Share your secrets and successes!
Love,
M
I’ve seen Glennon Melton’s Don’t Carpe Diem article linked over and over again in the past week and I wanted to take a minute to respond. I agree with many of the things the author says- Parenting is hard and ridiculous at times - it fluctuates often between moments of challenge and blessing.
But here is where we differ - there are days that the ONLY thing that does keep me from pulling my hair out or completely losing my cool - the only thing that helps me regain my composure- is remind myself that these are beautiful moments and I need to be here.
I have lost track of the number of nights I’ve swayed, one hip to the next with Arlo screaming bloody murder in my ears. It used to be every day, and then a few times a week, and these days, we can go about a week and half before he has an inconsolible night - but being able to rationalize that this time with him, this very moment - me, as his mother - he, as my infant son- is worth savoring too. Channeling that idea has made the experience feel less overwhelming: He needs you Melissa. Look at how small his hands are. One day the little red, screaming face is going to be a grown boy who’ll be flying past me and out the door. But right this moment, I’m the only person in the world who can help him through this. Shhh Shhh, Arlo. Mama’s here. Those nights are exhausting, mentally and physically but they are what they are - part of my experience in raising my son - and so I do my best to just take them at face value and find the good to get me through.
That doesn’t mean that I don’t lose my cool, that I don’t feel overwhelmed, that I don’t wish sometimes that I was somewhere else - but being able to stop and think about the fact that I get my children as babies for such a short period of time, and as toddlers and little children for for such a brief span in the course of their life - it’s what pushes me to buck up, to keep my wits, to do what I need to do to get us through the toughest of days (or nights).
I need that internal pep talk. The constant reminder. The time goes so fast. So damn fast. too fast. (It’s something I talk about almost obsessively here on my blog) But that realization doesn’t stress me, if anything it’s my reminder to slow down. Slow it all down and just be in this moment. The crying-and-can’t-be-calmed moments and the you-are-driving-me-crazy moments. While it works for me, I don’t expect it to work for everyone - but for my sanity, I will continue to say CARPE DIEM when it comes to raising my kids.
The worst moments and the best. I will sit in them and allow them to be whatever they are. Being able to look at the moment objectively - to find the beauty in the chaos or the humor in an otherwise stressful situation - it’s how I cope. I make mistakes and I get flustered and some days I think I very well may go insane… but reminding myself to be here- it always feels like an anchor to me. It’s how I get my arms back around the situation when I feel buried by the challenges of parenting. Maybe that makes me obnoxiously glass half full and the annoyingly silver-lining type - but it works for me.
I don’t want to wait until I’m the little old lady in the grocery store to realize that every part of this crazy, stressful, magical path through parenting is worth savoring. I need to do it every day, in little bits along the way. Attempting to savor all the good moments, but the hardest ones too. It’s how my heart and head work best. In my experience, that need doesn’t add pressure, it relieves it.
So that’s my two cents.
Carpe diem. over and over again.
Love,
M
(image via Fresh Words Market - and tacked to the wall in my bedroom!)
Toddler Discipline. Tactics for Raising A Well Behaved Child. Effective Methods for Managing your Toddler. How to Get Your Point Across To A Tiny Person Who (Mostly) Can’t Be Reasoned With.
I’m just going to put it out there.
I don’t know the first thing about disciplining Everly. Even the word discipline makes me cringe because it doesn’t sound like the right word. In fact, I know it’s not - what I’m trying to say is, when it comes to teaching her right from wrong, dealing with negative behaviors, etc, Brent and I are totally flying by the seat of our pants.
The things we do know (or think we do at least): Lead by example. Ignore (when appropriate)/react minimally to negative behaviors and praise positive behaviors. And also, time out. When all else fails, there’s always time out.
I feel like this is our most challenging stage of parenthood to date. Everly has quickly morphed into this little person with opinions and taste and an ability to vocalize her needs and desires. She’s become super perceptive and is also discovering her own limits, boundaries and abilities within our family structure. So often I feel like we have to walk the fine line between teaching her what is appropriate/safe/respectful & encouraging her own feelings/creativity/exploration.
Even within our united force of parenthood, Brent and I have debates as to what is the right thing to do. Just this week we had a disagreement regarding sidewalk chalk. I asked him to reinforce with Everly that we only use sidewalk chalk on the sidewalk and not on our metal lanterns, the front porch table, our rocking chairs, etc. His response ” I don’t want to limit her creativity by giving her rules on where she can and can’t draw” Me: “I see what you’re saying, but isn’t it important to teach her to respect and take care of her things?” Brent : “Yes, but they’re just things. and it can wash off.” Me: “You and I can reason that, but what if it was a black marker and our couch. Is it okay then?” AND ROUND AND ROUND WE GO.
We both value and want to encourage our daughter’s spirit, but we also want her to be respectful to herself and to others. We want to teach our children to seek out answers and challenge authority when something doesn’t feel right but we also want them to listen to and abide by our requests and rules and respect her teachers, family, friends and elders. We want all the creativity and wonder without the unruliness or recklessness.
How do we get both? We constantly ask ourselves. There are no guarantees or fool proof methods - and just as with everything else, every child’s needs, personality and desires will vary, even within the same household. What might work for Everly, may not for Arlo - even at this early stage in the game, it’s a constant practice of trial-evaluate-adjust.
Many of you commented on the value of the article I linked to on Friday. It has been immensely helpful to us in communicating effectively with our daughter and your comments make me think (hope?) that some of you are going through a similar experience.
All in all, (and I can say this with only a week’s foot in the door to parenting a 2 year old) Everly has been easy on us. Sure she cries sometimes when something doesn’t go her way, and she can be in a MOOD after she wakes up from her afternoon nap - but for the most part she’s a pleasant, happy-go-lucky little girl.
Despite our luck with navigating tantrums, we’ve found more challenges in her fearlessness. She is wide open and loves to climb on things, hide inside things, and explore new environments. This requires Brent and I to constantly anticipate situation/places that could be dangerous and we do our best to explain to her why she can’t do something that could hurt her, without scaring her.
Two weeks ago, she hid from me in the house one morning while Brent was on the back porch breaking down some boxes. He had the back door open and after a minute or two of calling for her without an answer, I asked Brent if she had come outside with him. “No, not that I noticed” he said back. We went into panic mode and we spent the next 5 minutes frantically searching and yelling her name inside and outside the house. I finally found her standing dead still and silent behind Arlo’s bedroom door with a smirk on her face. I drop to my knees and wrapped my arms around her. “Oh Everly! Please don’t hide from mommy. When I call your name, you have to answer me, ok? It’s so important. You scared mommy and daddy very very much.” I ran to the door with her, “I found her!” I yelled to Brent. He dropped to the ground and just laid there for a minute before coming inside. She had never done such a thing before and I think it scared us more than we cared to admit. What if she would have gotten outside? Someone could have taken her. She could have been hit by a car. All the worst scenarios run through your head in moments like that.
At the time, I was at a loss as to how to deal with the situation. Do I put her in time out and explain why? Do I stop fighting back the tears I was holding to show her that it upset me? I did neither - just sat on the couch holding her and telling her she has to answer when mommy or daddy call her name because it makes us sad and scared when we can’t find her.
More than anything, we just want to find a balance in dealing with these challenges- An approach that allows us to encourage her individualism while allowing us to create and enforce boundaries and rules when appropriate. We know that our tactics will have to change a thousand times between now and the day she moves out of our home but we want our children to know that we respect them, even if we don’t agree with or allow the behaviors that they are exhibiting.
If any of you out there have a similar parenting belief and have any resources you’d like to share, I’m all ears.
Love,
M
A Few Friday Links
A Rainbow of albums in our record collection
What a fun weekend we have ahead of us! We’re throwing a small little birthday party for Everly & her best buddy, Mylah West this Sunday. I think elaborate birthdays are inspiring and beautiful, but pulling one off last year for Everly’s 1st was SERIOUS work. I’ve vowed to keep all birthday parties (except the big ones - 1, 13, 16, etc) low key and kid centric - so my best friend Natasha and I teamed up this year to create a simple, fun day for our girls. A few close family members, a sprinkling of friends, some red bandanas, farm animal balloons, and a menu including corndogs and haystacks - and we’ve got ourselves a “Down on the Farm” party! She’s handling the food & I’m in charge of the decorations.
Here are a few links from around the internet that I’ve really loved lately:
- Obsessed with the amazing little girl shoes on this site. (Although, I’m gonna need them to cost about half the price in order to justify buying a pair for the dove)
- How beautiful and unique are these portrait plates? As a girl who has been known to decorate her walls in mismatched china dishes, I thoroughly approve.
- My blog friend Morgan has one of the loveliest birth stories. Her words are so melty & emotional to read. I loved reading about her journey to motherhood.
- This awesome article about talking to and addressing feelings in your toddler and child has been so helpful to me. We’ve used many of these communication tactics with Everly and it’s amazing how well she responds to the validation.
- My sweet friend Jen of Jen Love’s Kev posted a great tutorial on The Style Mentors blog about how to wear colored tights during the cooler months. Hooray for rainbow hued gams!
- Need a little chuckle today? This lady has to be the coolest aunt ever! Seriously, if I was a famous pop singer, I’d be calling her up right this minute to be a back up dancer.
Anything fun on your agenda for the weekend, dear readers? You know what I’m looking forward to soon? A weekend with zero plans. - with nary a project or commitment in sight. We need to make that happen!
Love,
M
To the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other’s hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time. ~Clara Ortega
